World Cup & Soccer Floppers. If you 3rd world dumps want respect, stop acting like sopping pussies.
UPDATE!!!!! Looks like we can put soccer back in the closet for 4 years.
Larry has been watching the World Cup lately because it’s in Africa, and we all know African tribe womens like to show their tits. Africa is also home to Malaria, Ebola and AIDS. To all of which Larry serves as a host body. The soccer part is secondary. Well listen up clowns, Larry has yet to see any of said tits, but he has seen plenty of Oscar-worthy dick lickers roll around on the ground writhing in imaginary pain. Seriously, you fuckin shit heaps make the NBA look like they run on the honor system. Someone tell these douches to get up and act like men. You look like a bunch whiney bitches. If there isn’t bone sticking out of the skin then you aren’t hurt. Every single time there is some brand of contact the flailing begins, followed by pleading at the officials.
Yes General Bradley. Expose the non-hackers.
Oh what’s that? A few mintues left in the game and you’re team is struggling to hold onto a narrow lead? Better pretend to be hurt and roll around like a coward. GET DA FUCK UP!! Stop moaning and stroke that ball towards the fucking net!!! No one is watching to see you fucking queens priss around and complain! People want shots and goals and hysteria!!! God dammit. Respect yourself. Respect your sport. Larry thinks if you get knocked down, get up like a warrior, blood & sweat flying and rampage towards the goal like a mad man knocking shots like a mother fucker. The crowd will go ape-shit. That’s what gets the fans fired up.
In addition… the world better pray to Zues that America doesn’t start getting more serious about soccer. Larry is a strong believer that Uncle Sam raises the best athletes in the world, they just focus on other sports. Imagine Michael Vick or Reggie Bush trained their entire life to play soccer instead of football. Oh sweet jesus. You can’t look Larry in the eyes with a straight face and tell him that Pele is a better speciman than those fucking thoroughbreds. And if you do then are a god damn liar and you will duel Larry. So bring your fucking flintlock pistol.
Larry also heard the game will not be watched/discussed in Guantanamo Bay to reduce hostilities between the guards and the terrorists. Well know this clowns, if Larry was in charge he would call all prisoners into the cafeteria and make them watch the last 10 minutes of the USA vs Algeria match on loop for 10 hours straight. Mwuahaha.
With that out of the way, Larry will admit that this World Cup has intrigued Larry. It has been most exiciting and worthy of Larry’s time. Larry has moved soccer up on the respect list.
Uh-oh get the gurney!! Wait nevermind. Just a case of superpower envy.
